If you lay down in the prone position before establishing a dominant relationship with a dog, there is a good chance that he’s going to hump you regardless of your preference on the matter. Dogs do not overanalyze relationships. In their mind, everyone is fair game until it is proven too troublesome or dangerous. While it lacks the subtle and romantic nature of some human relationships, there is something to be learned here. Obviously the love of a dog cannot entirely replace that of a person (legally, or otherwise). I am just saying that I have never heard of a dog leaving someone because they didn’t make enough money or got old and fat. Humans have the unique ability to turn a relatively simple concept into an unspeakable imbroglio. This pays off when applied to the arts but is rarely beneficial within the boundaries of a relationship unless you are the sort of person that thrives on drama. I love adventure but, like a dog, relationships should be purposeful and easy to understand.
A friend of mine recently told me that it is innate for a woman who has dumped a man to still be jealous of his new girlfriend. If she had replaced, “innate” with “mentally unsound” I would have agreed wholeheartedly. There just seems to be something wrong about ending a relationship and remaining territorial about a person you are not planning on resuming a relationship with. That would be like if I threw away half of a sandwich that I didn’t want and then got upset that a homeless person picked it out of the trash. What kind of logic is that? What type of person wants something they threw away? It’s, quite literally, out of my hands so why should I care if someone else wants to eat it? Equally bizarre is the increasingly large number of acquaintances that are telling me that they are having difficulties maintaining a relationship. Too many people have come up to me and said, “I worry that I am losing them but I don’t know what to do.”
Whether you use appeal or intimidation, there are really only two ways to keep a romantic partner. A person is going to be with you because they either want to be or because they are afraid to be without you. Now I’m not suggesting that you start beating your spouse if you notice the relationship going sour but that does appear to be a fairly popular option within certain demographics. I just think that it is strange that we put such a strong emphasis on a particular person and then have such a difficult time keeping them in our lives.
I’m not convinced that it all comes down to hormones, genes and menstrual cycles. Sure, like most people, I try to find a woman who is ovulating non-stop but even that can’t fix everything. There are just too many things about love that are impossible to account for, especially at the very beginning and end of a relationship.
While we are on the subject, I recently finished a short film that I can quite easily segue into. The subject matter is very much related. It’s about one headstrong and curious woman’s ingress into what very well might be a romantic faux pas and is called Digital Romance.