Modern Problems: The Cultivation of Pulchritude in Ugliness

There is a distinct absence of class today.  Back during what many refer to as in the day, if two parties had a disagreement, someone would have made a clever quip and then tap danced up a marble staircase.  Chances are, they would have probably even taken you out for a fancy dinner to settle your differences so you could discuss the matter over coffee, tea, champagne or all three mixed together.   If emotions were to run too high and an accord could not be reached, dueling rules were established.  Fights never broke out randomly.  Everyone took off their jacket before fisticuffs and took it outside and if they were already outside, they took it to the wilderness.  Even domestic violence was classier.  People only beat their own spouses and they usually exchanged gifts afterward.  It was basically a paradise.  There was a renaissance and then everybody stopped going to the bathroom in the streets and started using handkerchiefs.  Of course there were exceptions to the rules, often in the form of toothless chambermaids and stable boys.

As time marched on, the general population gradually became more exposed to the rest of the world through increased literacy rates.  Lewdness was coyly hinted at but rarely exposed outright.  Then came radio, television and the Pandora’s box of the world wide web.  These things turned a world full of handsome knowledgeable men who pursued gentlemanly conquests into a planet of hideous warmongering misers.  Terrifying magic has been replaced with the dull stability of scientific reasoning and, all of a sudden, people are trying to give everyone access to free information.  You can hardly even sit around without learning something these days.  While this may sound all right, let me remind you that it was at the expense of sophistication.  If you don’t believe me, try to imagine Gregory Peck checking his email or surfing around on an image board with his mouth open.

There are people out there that can’t live a normal life because they are addicted to pornography.

“Disgustingness” has evolved right along with humanity.  In fact, it might even have outpaced us.  If you’ve ever seen someone eating a turkey leg at a renaissance fair, you know exactly what I’m talking about.  With the internet, we’ve turned abhorrence into a business and business is booming, although, like information and entertainment, online perversion is unlimited and mostly free of charge.  That hasn’t stopped some people from spending nine-ninety-nine a month on it.  This is because the easy access to it results in a decidedly swift desensitization.  People yearn for a full-spectrum of emotional pain and cerebral sensationalism.  The heinously bizarre is sought out, absorbed and sought out again.  There is nothing inherently wrong with this.  The problem arises when a person becomes incapable of putting themselves into a normal situation due to sensory overload and the inability to relate to real life.  It isn’t their fault, it’s just the nature of the beast.  It can be too much too fast too often.  Before the internet, if you wanted the kind of mind-altering penetration at the same frequency, you would have had to go to the circus and pay everyone in the freak show to eat each other.

Do not mistake me.  I like having instant access to something so horrifically bizarre that, if I showed it to a theater full of hardened criminals, they would be so dumbstruck that you could hear a rat pissing on a cotton ball.  We should never ever take a gift that great away from ourselves.  We just need to police ourselves a little better and, occasionally, use these tools to make ourselves better informed and more talented individuals.  Remind yourself that, for every three videos of people crushing food with their armpits, there is probably a great article that can actually teach you something.

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About You Monsters Are People

Wisdom, wonderment and weird for everyone.
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17 Responses to Modern Problems: The Cultivation of Pulchritude in Ugliness

  1. Cindy says:

    Eating midgets and bearded ladies? Crushing food in your armpit? I think you may just have a food fetish ;)

  2. What has long been produced in Washington by 535 + 1 has been pornographic to the point it has ruined the whole nation with filth

  3. “If you’ve ever seen someone eating a turkey leg at a renaissance fair, you know exactly what I’m talking about.” ~ What if this didn’t happen at a Renaissance fair? What if it happened at my kitchen table? During Thanksgiving? With no one around so I could eat 2 turkey legs at a time, one in each hand?

    Still disgusting? I hope not, sir…not that it ever happened.

  4. peculiarpotato says:

    The only reason I get on the internet is to learn.Yes there is a bunch of crap we have to wade through but, somewhere in all that crap is say,learning another language,schools,how to’s, etc. Great articles are everywhere.I guess it is up to the individual to find out if they’re being duped…………………………P.P.

  5. I will never watch ET the same way again. Thanks. Thanks a lot.

  6. asoulwalker says:

    “A rat pissing on a cotton ball…” wow… thank you.

  7. peculiarpotato says:

    Posky I don’t know if you received the message I left for you on my blog,but,I’ll just cut to the tits of it. I’ve dubbed thee Sir Knight,Posky,Spud of Humor………That is all….I will take my leave….good-night…Knight………….Sincerely,PeculiarPotato……..

  8. In other words, our inner beasts has been unleashed, renaissance man sacked, and our society progressing with idiocy. In a once competitive world where a person next to you was also your rival, now digressing to the next person reading up on what new leaked celeb photo there are or gossiping who did what on which and where, I find this new found state acceptable and beneficial…for me.
    Profound, lewd, neanderthals, I like it. So how much longer til we start walking like Adam&Eve, give or take.

  9. nursemyra says:

    I’ve never been to a Renaissance Fair

    • Posky says:

      My friends and I dressed up like we were from the future and went to one in 2007, acting as if we were time travelers.

      We received a lot of attention but mixed reviews.

      I learned a lot that day. You should definitely go to one.

  10. Cliff says:

    good stuff. Just watched the Timestronauts video. Looked like the women were wearing table cloths….guess they ate the whole turkey

  11. lunasealife says:

    I am going to make it a point to tap dance up a marble staircase during my next disagreement. Shouldn’t be too difficult as there are a surprising number of marble staircases here in Buenos Aires.

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