Category Archives: true stories

Literate Animals

Posted on July 11, 2014 by You Monsters Are People

Jean Cocteau said that the worst tragedy for a poet is to be admired through being misunderstood. I bet that’s true. In hopefully unrelated news, Katie Fox was the big winner of the hat and doesn’t even look remotely stupid … Continue reading →

Posted in animals, books, cats, comics, Life, society, true stories | Tagged , , , , , , | 5 Comments

Unhappily Returning From Vacation

Posted on June 30, 2014 by You Monsters Are People

I spent the last couple of weeks visiting my family in Michigan. My mother is a school teacher and I found out that they no longer use blackboards or chalk. While I understand the benefits of whiteboards, there is something aesthetically … Continue reading →

Posted in america, Current Events, Life, society, true stories | Tagged , , , , , , , , | 7 Comments

I Didn’t Get Stabbed: My Time at a Dive Bar Karaoke

Posted on June 13, 2014 by You Monsters Are People

There is a dive-bar somewhere in the Midwest that several of my friends claim makes you pay the cover charge in teeth.  When considering the usual clientele, this seems less like a joke and more like a plausible assumption to … Continue reading →

Posted in america, Dark Humor, friendship, humor, Life, motorcycles, society, true stories | Tagged , , , , , , , , , | 16 Comments

Life Is Meaningless… Unless It Includes A Free Hat Giveaway

Posted on June 4, 2014 by You Monsters Are People

Are you a fan of You Monsters Are People but still feel like a worthless human being because you’ve never done anything to support it? Have you wanted to help out but just aren’t an altruistic enough person? Do you … Continue reading →

Posted in Current Events, humor, style, true stories | Tagged , , , | 24 Comments

I Was Raped By Garbage Culture In A Theater Full Of People

Posted on May 21, 2014 by You Monsters Are People

Garbage culture is so pervasive that we can’t escape being involved in it somehow. It doesn’t matter if you don’t watch television or follow celebrity news, it will eventually catch up with you. Despite actively trying to avoid it for … Continue reading →

Posted in america, Dark Humor, Life, society, true stories | Tagged , , , , , , , | 11 Comments

Calling Out All Moms

Posted on May 11, 2014 by You Monsters Are People

I just want to thank my mom for not being a stupid bitch, like a lot of other people’s moms (and if those other moms disagree I will totally fight them in the park tonight at eleven-thirty unless they are … Continue reading →

Posted in Current Events, Dark Humor, Life, true stories | Tagged , , , , | 8 Comments

Western Civilization Is Nearly Over: Become A Hater And Make A Difference

Posted on May 7, 2014 by You Monsters Are People

Becoming a hater is one the greatest things you can do with your life in these troubled postmodern times. However, the prevailing popularity of willful ignorance and complacency may make finding like-minded individuals difficult. A lot of America has thrown … Continue reading →

Posted in america, Current Events, Dark Humor, history, humor, Life, society, true stories | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , | 30 Comments

Pet Projects

Posted on May 2, 2014 by You Monsters Are People

It has been a ruff couple of weeks and I have yet to make heads or tails of it. There has been little time to take paws and assess all of the work I have been doing lately. Hopefully I finish … Continue reading →

Posted in art, Current Events, Life, pets, true stories | Tagged , , , , , | 10 Comments

They Can Put A Man On The Moon

Posted on April 15, 2014 by You Monsters Are People

Americans used to be able to complain about something by saying “they can put a man on the moon….” Well they can put a man on the moon but now they can’t even do that anymore.

Posted in america, humor, Life, musings, science, society, true stories | Tagged , , , , | 15 Comments

Prison: Not Just for Criminals

Posted on March 18, 2014 by You Monsters Are People

There are still thousands of people in Colorado and Washington state prisons as a result of criminal possession or sale of marijuana– which has been legal for the last year. These states have already amassed several million in tax revenue … Continue reading →

Posted in Current Events, Dark Humor, musings, politics, society, true stories | Tagged , , , , , , | 14 Comments