Category Archives: humor

Lame New World: A Preface For Our Awful Future

Not long ago I was filling out a number of worksheets intended for small children, as I have a propensity to do during an evening of moderate drinking, and they pressed me into wondering about the future of politics and … Continue reading

Posted in america, animals, Dark Humor, humor, Internet Culture, Life, politics, science, society | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , | 16 Comments

My New Mom Is A Computer

Like many of you, I was born of a human mother made of soft pink flesh and electric impulses wrapped up in skin and topped with hair. She was a kindly woman and my father loved her dearly for all … Continue reading

Posted in Current Events, Dark Humor, humor, Life, science, society, true stories | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , | 23 Comments

Smoking: Still Totally Cool

I used to love smoking. For years smoking allowed me to take longer and more frequent breaks at work, was a good excuse to get off my ass and go outside, and frequently allowed me an opportunity to start up … Continue reading

Posted in america, comics, Dark Humor, humor, Life, science, society, style, true stories, web comics | Tagged , , , , , , , , | 50 Comments

Become A Billionaire Before Black Friday!

The other day I was eating a money-themed candy bar and thought to myself, “I’m not going to have enough cash to buy people Christmas gifts again.” I usually try to convince myself that the holidays are all about spending … Continue reading

Posted in america, Current Events, Dark Humor, humor, Life, society | Tagged , , , , , , , , | 19 Comments

An Apology To People Who Hate Reading

Last week I wrote the scariest story ever told for everyone’s Halloween enjoyment. While it received plenty of accolades and is currently being made into an audiobook, some of my fans complained that it was too long for them to … Continue reading

Posted in america, comics, Current Events, Dark Humor, halloween, humor, Internet Culture, stories | Tagged , , , , , | 28 Comments

The SCARIEST Story EVER Told

DISCLAIMER: This is an incredibly scary story to be read by adults only. If you are a child please ask your parents before reading this very spooky tale. It is not intended for people with weak hearts or epilepsy.  TRIGGER … Continue reading

Posted in Dark Humor, friendship, halloween, humor | Tagged , , , , | 25 Comments

These 15 Photos Of Cosplayers Revealing That They Aren’t Unemployed Virgins Or Child Molesters “Might Blow Your Mind”

A popular internet content aggregator asked some of the “best cosplayers of New York Comic Con” to reveal what they did with their days and none of them confessed to jerking off to anime and steampunk all day or spending … Continue reading

Posted in america, art, comics, Current Events, Dark Humor, humor, Internet Culture, society, style | Tagged , , , , , , , | 11 Comments

Take This, Society.

That ought to rattle a few cages.

Posted in art, humor, society | Tagged , , , | 9 Comments

A Fond Look Back: Vomit And Strip Clubs

My first time at a strip club was when I was seventeen. My friend’s older brother was a DJ for such an establishment and thought it would be an important passage into manhood for us. I had previously been in … Continue reading

Posted in Dark Humor, friendship, history, humor, Life, religion, stories, true stories | Tagged , , , , , , , | 9 Comments

YouTube Banned Something I Liked

The humorless democratization of entertainment and politically correct jerk-off festival that the internet has become is really bumming me out. Last week the contentious comedy troupe, Million Dollar Extreme, was banned from YouTube. The channel initially went down on July 16th and has … Continue reading

Posted in art, Current Events, Dark Humor, humor, Internet Culture, society, true stories, Uncategorized | Tagged , , , , , , , , , | 7 Comments